As a 22 year old virgin (and proud of it), I don't believe in having sex until the man that I love, puts a ring on my finger and says "I Do." I've always believe in this for a number of reasons. Before I was a Christian, I believed in waiting because I'd see these girls on talk shows whine about how they were dumped by their boyfriends after having sex and I'd think, "well, that wouldn't have happened if these girls would just say no." After I became a Christian, I realized hat God also wants me to wait because that's one of His plans for my life. Below I have listed reasons why you should wait, what to say when you feel pressure to have sex, and other interesting tidbits I hope you will like.
Reasons To Wait
1. GOD SAYS SO: "Marriage should be honored by all and the marriage bed kept pure, for God will judge the adulterer and the sexually immoral." Hebrews 1:3-4 2. Sex IN marriage is one of the most romantic things that you will ever experience in your life. Read Song of Songs 2 for a definition of sex inside of a loving marriage. 3. AIDS and other STDS 4. Pregnancy 5. Respect for Yourself: How do you know if he/she will call the next day or want to continue dating you after you've given it up to them? Because they said so? HA! People lie and some lie really good. Many will tell you whatever it is that you want to hear just to get you to go to bed with them. If a real man/woman loves you, they won't ask you to have pre-marital sex and then dump you when you say "no." 6. Respect For Your Future Spouse: Just think of how wonderful it'll be to tell the person you married that you've waited just for them. Wouldn't you love to hear someone say to you, "I loved you so much before I even knew you, that I waited just for you?"
2. Sex IN marriage is one of the most romantic things that you will ever experience in your life. Read Song of Songs 2 for a definition of sex inside of a loving marriage.
3. AIDS and other STDS
5. Respect for Yourself: How do you know if he/she will call the next day or want to continue dating you after you've given it up to them? Because they said so? HA! People lie and some lie really good. Many will tell you whatever it is that you want to hear just to get you to go to bed with them. If a real man/woman loves you, they won't ask you to have pre-marital sex and then dump you when you say "no."
6. Respect For Your Future Spouse: Just think of how wonderful it'll be to tell the person you married that you've waited just for them. Wouldn't you love to hear someone say to you, "I loved you so much before I even knew you, that I waited just for you?"
FACT 1: Birth control is not 100%. I don't care if it's 95%. Is that 5% worth risking your life over? Do you care so little about yourself that you'd rather risk getting AIDS for a few moments of pleasure? Trust me, there are those who have gotten pregnant and/or AIDS while using condoms. Can you be 100% sure that you won't be one of them? How do you know that the ball's in your court? How do you know for sure that bad luck won't hit you? How do you know that you won't be in that 5% or even 1%? Answer.....you don't, so why risk it? I'm sure that those who have gotten AIDS with protection where once thinking that it won't happen to them. I'm sure they said, "what are the chances it'll happen to me?" Well, look where they are now.
FACT 2: Protection does not protect you from God. He is not going to say, "well, its fine as long as you protect yourself."
FACT 3: God doesn't change with the times. You won't find Him saying, "it's the 90's so its okay. Everybody's doing it anyway."
If you ever feel pressured by someone into having sex, here are a few simple responses that you may want to remember. In red is the "line" that you may be given and in purple is the response you should throw back at them.
"Real men have sex."(So does my real dog)
"If you loved me, you'd let me."(If you loved me, you wouldn't ask)
"But I want to."(Well, I don't)
"Everybody's doing it."(Not true. I'm somebody and I'm not doing it).
"Have you ever done it?"(Have you ever made the wonderful decision of knowing Christ?)
"Don't you love me?"(Yeah, but I love God more).
"I won't get you pregnant."(That's right, because you're not going to touch me)
"If you won't let me, I'll find somebody who will."(Its been nice knowing you).
"But you owe me."(Okay, I'll buy you a keychain or something).
Below I have listed ways in which you can keep from putting yourself in a position that may lead you down the wrong path, into a situation you may later come to regret.
Don't watch any movies with a lot (or any sex). And if a scene like that does show up,push fast forward (that's what I always do!)
Go out on double dates.
If you don't double date, then go out in public places. A movie theater is much better then being home alone on the couch and watching a movie. That's not bad or anything, but if that is something that could be tempting, then don't do it. Or at least watch a movie that itself isn't tempting. For example, Basic Instinct is more likely to tempt you sexually then Terminator 2.
Don't have unplanned dates. That way, you won't wind up being bored and looking for "something else" to do.
Don't wear suggestive clothing.
Set standards for yourself. No what you will and won't do with the opposite sex. Some don't believe in kissing on a first date while others don't believe in kissing until the wedding day. Know exactly how far you will and won't go with someone and know the other person's standards as well.
Pray together and study the Bible together.
Society says that real men have sex and that if you don't, then you must be gay or something. First of all, that makes absolutely no sense at all (gay men don't have sex? Hmmm.....). Second, don't buy into the lie! There are plenty of young ladies out there (myself included? who admire and respect men who are strong enough to say "no." If you want to act all strong and macho and try to impress the ladies then "just say no." Weak men give into temptaton, but real men resist it. And if you have had sex, then being able to stop and not going down that path anymore is also a sign of strength (and we girls LOVE strong men)!!!!! Not only that, but saying no also shows that you respect yourself and that you respect women. There are tons of women out there who would give anything to find a man who is willing to say, "I love you so much that I'm willing to wait" or "you're worth waiting for." Too many men give up a good thing (their ladies) in the name of sex. So don't buy into society's lie and remember.....real men DON'T have sex.
"Father, my society is obsessed with sex. Give me wisdom. Remind me of what is right and what is wrong. Grant me the grace to live a pure life in an impure very world. I want my friends and the world to see that sex is best when its reserved for marriage. In Jesus Name, Amen."
The following guestbook is different then the one on the main page of my site. This guestbook is for those of you who have chosen to wait to have sex until marriage. Let me know about your decision, and if you still don't know if you want to wait, say so and maybe we can talk about it. This is for those who are virgins AND recycled virgins. If you want, you may tell me when you made this decision, how old you were, and why you made it (religion, STD's, AIDS, etc). Also, tell me what you think of my True Love Waits Page. Anything I should add? Anything I should take off? Let me know! Thanks and God Bless!
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